Cheer up, Charlie: the name of the ska band I never started

The remake of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory: cinematically proving my theory that a pack of attacking squirrels is the scariest thing imaginable. I was literally short of breath while that scene played out my greatest fear in brilliant color and giant size on the silver screen before me. It freaked me out.

I also thought that the stretched-out figure of Mike Teevee as he exited the factory kind of looked like me. Or at least represented how other people see me. And that made me sad. So very sad.

Also, "Puppet Burn Ward." Hee hee hee.

(The preceding three paragraphs would make very little sense if you have not in fact seen the remake of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I would say that this is something you should rectify as soon as possible. I can recommend the film, as several bits made me laugh heartily, especially the first time they cut to a close-up of Christopher Lee. I just thought it was funny that Dooku/Saruman was Willy Wonka's dad.)

And now, some more pictures from the tropics.



Here I am on an island near Highbourne Cay, feeding native iguanas. They were pretty cool guys, except a couple of them who tried to whip me with their tails. That's how they attack. Pretty scary, but not as much as a pack of squirrels. Ugh...squirrels. *shiver*



This big guy was my friend, but not at first. At first he was all, "I'm gonna eat your face." But I was all, "How about this banana instead?" And he was all, "Sweet! I don't have teeth, but I can just gum that banana into mush. Thanks, man!" And I was all, "You don't have teeth? Forget it, loser!" I SCREAMED at him!!

Then he ate my face.

It took a long time because he didn't have teeth.



Then I got it back, which is good, otherwise this picture would have been terrible. This is a fish cleaning station in Highbourne. If you'll notice the sign, it gives instructions: "Poke da eyes, cut da guts, clean up da mess." These instructions also apply to the area's mafia-run drug smuggling operations.



I totally look like a model in this picture, but anyone can look like a model if the background is this pretty.

I had a great time on the boat, but all good things come to an end. So to get me home, my aunt and uncle shipped me off with some relative strangers on a sport fishing boat who were headed to Nassau. This is neighborly behavior in the sailing world. We only had to pay them a bottle of liquor.

Nassau is an interesting city, with tons of tourists and also trash. I walked around the opulent Atlantis resort with my right hand buried in my pocket so no one would notice my Holiday Inn wristband. It was worth just looking, because the architecture and accomodations were fairly ridiculous. They had an amazing attraction called "The Dig" which was basically an aquarium with nice set pieces to make it look like ruins. Huge sting rays there. HUGE. I also walked through the casino and thought about playing a bit until I saw people playing $500 blackjack. So I just shouted "Double down!!" a few times and then left.

Now I'm back in Boca, hanging out with my two cousins, which involves skimboarding and scavenging condemned buildings for old electronics equipment, depending on who I'm with. My cousins are very different. Also, we watched Cloak & Dagger. It was great.

Finally, many of you have heard me extol the virtues of Dinosaur Comics, either on this blog or in person. Well, I've taken the obsession to a new level. In the last post's comments, I made a comment that made me feel a bit like one of the characters in the comic. So, since the artwork is the same in every strip, I downloaded a template and made my own. This is dedicated to anyone who didn't like my hat.