7.25.2005

Shoulda been a boxer

Ah, it's good to be back in Ill-i-nwah. I'd had just about enough of being in a state that Sufjan Stevens hasn't written an album about. I'll never do it again. It's only Michigan and Illinois from here on out. Until he writes more albums. C'mon Rhode Island! (By the way, Sufjan's "Come On Feel the Illinoise" is really good. I'm just finishing it now. Not surprisingly, my favorite track was "Chicago" although coming in a surprising second was "Jacksonville.")

I just got done setting up my room AGAIN. I did it when I came home from college, but apparently, coming home from vacation warrants a re-set up as well. It seems that in my absence it was necessary to box up my entire room and move it so carpet could be laid. (Note that I timed my vacation to avoid this manual labor. Pretty brilliant if you ask me.) So I came back and everything was in boxes. And now, after much work, stuff is no longer in boxes. I'm very proud of my accomplishment, considering I've done nothing that required much effort (except fighting a forest fire) in the last couple weeks. (Oh, and laser tag! I played laser tag with my cousin. It was rad.)

It reminded me of an aptitude test I took once. (The unpacking of boxes, not the laser tag. That would have been an awesome aptitude test.) This was one in early high school and was supposed to tell all the confused little kiddies what careers best suit them. There was a section on your interests that asked a series of "Do you like to..." questions. You then marked yes or no. Sounds like a blast, I know. I remember one question very specifically:

"Do you like to...put things in boxes?"

It made me laugh at first, because it was so ridiculous. But then I started to think, "Wait, I DO like putting things in boxes." Then I started to overthink, "But what if I put yes? Will the results* tell me that my skills and interests mean that I'm best suited to be a packer for all my life? I don't want that! I mean, I like putting things in boxes, don't get me wrong. I like it, but forever is a long time to be packing boxes."

So I put no.

Sometimes I wonder if my life would have gone differently if I had marked yes on that test.** Would I have even gone to college? Would I have moved to some city with docks? Maybe God's trying to tell me something. Something like, "Hey moron! Forget this whole "making people laugh" business! I made you to put things in boxes! Why do you think your arms are so long, huh?! Stop typing on your stupid blog, move to Detroit, and get to packing!" Yeah, I think that's exactly what he's trying to say.***

Well, that settles it. Look out room, you're going back in the box!!



*results: very easy to mistype as resluts. Be careful.
**This is not a serious statement. I am not having an existential crisis. Do not panic.
***I like this footnotes bit.

3 comments:

Scott said...

If God was liberal he would probably tell you to move to San Francisco and start packing. Hey-OH!

In other news, what did I tell you about Come On Feel The Illinoise*? It's gold, GOLD! And those aptitude tests... did anyone NOT try to engineer their answers. Every single question on the test I began to try to divine what career they were trying to push on me. If I say I like to build wooden toys are they going to try to convince me to become a carpenter, or... I don't know, Amish? Seriously, who plays with wooden toys.

Good post.**

- Scott

*I cannot stand people who pronounce it this way (Illi-noiSE). Get out of my state.
**I love your spelling jokes, they are the better known cousin to my oft used grammatical schtick.***
***More or less only used on the internet.

Scott said...

Whoa Timmy, I thought this one warranted at least two comments. What's the deal with your blogging public these days? Summer break? Lack of keyboards? Syphilis? (Though how syphilis would prevent commenting I couldn't say...)

Here's your second comment, free of charge. When you get big just remember who your real friends are.


- Scott

P.S. They're the ones who comment alot.

Anonymous said...

Tim, I am always entertained by your blog, and Scotts too!

Just a silent (mostly) bystander. Mom F