Not the shortest post ever, but you're in the ballpark.

Okay fine. You want the midget post? You'll get the midget post.

Friday night, a group of friends and I went to see Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow. (Amazing film, by the way. Incredible visual style and artistry. Good story and a great cast. It also had a bold comedic flair, which pleasntly surprised me. Especially when such an epic film ends on a silly joke. Very risky. But very bold.)

At any rate, we went to the new cinema at Jordan Creek, which is ridiculously expensive but a really nice place. It is also my new favorite place to go people watching. Because we saw some great people.

We were all hanging around outside after the movie, when one of my friends said, "Tim, look over there." I turned, and there stood the smallest midget I had ever seen. I mean, we're talking two, two-and-a-half feet at most. I quickly turned my head and began to laugh.

Now, it's important to note at this point that I was not laughing AT the midget. I was laughing at how utterly unprepared I was to see a person that small before me and how inappropriate my reaction was. It should be said that for the rest of the night, no one laughed AT the midget. He seemed like a nice guy. Very friendly, well-dressed, obviously doing well for himself. He drove off in a giant red SUV, for goodness sakes. (Okay, that we laughed at. A midget driving an SUV? That's funny.)

But the memorable point came in the car as we drove home. We were still talking about the guy when Raph said, "Midgets are the most under-represented minority in America. If you laugh at other minorities, you're a racist, but if you laugh at them, it's okay."

Under-represented. He actually used the term "under-represented" in reference to midgets. As you can imagine, that only opened the door to more terrible puns. And it wasn't a small door. It was a giant, Sky Captain plane hangar pair of doors that we drove our bad comedy zeppelin right through.

Here were the responses:
Me: "Yeah Raph, they really got the SHORT end of the stick on that deal. I bet people wish they could see MORE of them."
Emeric: "Yeah, they really don't have great STATURE in society."

Now in retrospect, that's nothing more than a series of terrible jokes that happened to follow the comedic rule of three. But at that moment, in that car, it was as if magic happened. We were laughing so hard, we had to pull over.

So that's the midget story. All that, and it basically amounts to "you had to be there." Good job, Tim. Oh, there was also a guy with a raccoon tail, but that's a story for another time.